Sunday, while I waited to hear if the fate of our future was going to be seriously altered by health care reform, I was glad it's not up to me. We pondered how do we pray about this. Do we ask God for more mercy when clearly America deserves no more? Yes, I asked. Even now in the uncertainty of the days ahead, God still knows what is going on. He isn't going to leave us to deal with the trouble all by ourselves. It's hard to be so helpless when loved ones are sick, hurting, struggling in some way. I can't do anything to fix their problems. Maybe that isn't God's plan. Would I really want to know what kind of person I would be if I had not gone through some of the pain of the past? For all the time I've spent hating the bad memories that may not even be real; do they have some greater purpose? Fear brought me to the feet of Jesus. Pain kept me in the arms of God.
Up in the wee hours of the morning, is yet another perk of being bipolar. Yes, that's sarcasm because unlike some, I don't like being like this. I started getting a little more hyper than usual and now I can't sleep. I slept for an hour or two when hubby woke me up and I couldn't get back to sleep after. So I wasn't worried about anything, but I was wide awake. Even though I now feel tired, I still don't feel sleepy. It is hard to explain. Well I already took some calm down medicine and that didn't work so I am getting ready to take more. I use it only when I have to, but considering I need to function in a few hours I WILL consider this one of those times. I was excited about started school and I guess maybe I am going through an up cycle. That sort of makes sense since I had a down cycle in the beginning of the summer. I am glad that the cycles are much shorter than they used to be. I remember being tired and having little energy or ambition to do anyt...
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