Bipolar, but still Christian : Just Another Challege

It happened. I opporating on not enough sleep said exactly what I was thinking to complete strangers. I guess you could say I popped. Funny thing was that they were grown women acting like children. They were embarished and ashamed of their bad behavior. I being me was also embarished and just burst into tears. All said and done I am not sure it was a good thing, but I am so not going to worry about anymore. I finally got a nap today and I just want to relax and do something creative. I don't enjoy being harsh with people even when they deserve it. Looking forward to tomorrow and hanging out with familiar friends. They do not usually get me either, but at least with them I am loved. I am not sure where from here. I am not depressed just worn out. More sleep and better clarity of mind will be very helpful. I also need to do things I love like play with toddlers and sing. Maybe go hiking in the trees. Beauty of nature has a calming remidy all its own. Like the babbles of brook waters...

What discusts me today is adults acting like children. This is not necessarily that uncommon a practice. I hated school. Oh so many reasons not the least of them being the way I was treated by my peers. It was one thing to be ignored and isolated as a kid, but far different to deal with it as a grown up. It just irritates me. I don't want to be friends with people who act like that, but I have a hard time just ignoring it. I want to get in their face and fight for the girl I was. The girl who could not fight for herself. So there is the part of me that says, "you are an adult now; they are not worth it." Then the other part wants to get right in their face and tell them to, "Knock it off!" "You are no better than anyone else." Here's the thing though. They probably do not think that at all, nor are they doing this conscientiously. I just get so frustrated with it. For once it would be nice to be chosen. I know it is my lack of normal social skills ...