You ever try to walk through muddy grass. You try to walk around the water and find your feet sinking down in. I have been trying to get out of the "mud" of life, but keep sinking down into it. Feeling frustrated today I tried my best to cheer up only to be plugged back by my selfish teenager. Trying my best to be understanding while I listen to all the reasons why ignoring all responsibilities is okay because, "I have plenty of time." I had been annoyed earlier today with the people around me who continue to be oblivious to their excluding behavior. I can't continue to pretend it doesn't matter. The statement was made you go expecting someone to bless you. Sorry, but, No that isn't what I expect or even need. I just want to be included. If that can't happen here then, I can't continue to justify being here. Praying God will give me a different alternative because that just isn't working.
Up in the wee hours of the morning, is yet another perk of being bipolar. Yes, that's sarcasm because unlike some, I don't like being like this. I started getting a little more hyper than usual and now I can't sleep. I slept for an hour or two when hubby woke me up and I couldn't get back to sleep after. So I wasn't worried about anything, but I was wide awake. Even though I now feel tired, I still don't feel sleepy. It is hard to explain. Well I already took some calm down medicine and that didn't work so I am getting ready to take more. I use it only when I have to, but considering I need to function in a few hours I WILL consider this one of those times. I was excited about started school and I guess maybe I am going through an up cycle. That sort of makes sense since I had a down cycle in the beginning of the summer. I am glad that the cycles are much shorter than they used to be. I remember being tired and having little energy or ambition to do anyt...
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