You ever try to walk through muddy grass. You try to walk around the water and find your feet sinking down in. I have been trying to get out of the "mud" of life, but keep sinking down into it. Feeling frustrated today I tried my best to cheer up only to be plugged back by my selfish teenager. Trying my best to be understanding while I listen to all the reasons why ignoring all responsibilities is okay because, "I have plenty of time." I had been annoyed earlier today with the people around me who continue to be oblivious to their excluding behavior. I can't continue to pretend it doesn't matter. The statement was made you go expecting someone to bless you. Sorry, but, No that isn't what I expect or even need. I just want to be included. If that can't happen here then, I can't continue to justify being here. Praying God will give me a different alternative because that just isn't working.
I am starting my own blog to reduce my boredom and give me a place to put my thoughts. Recently some people I know put some very difficult words out for all the world to see. I have been chicken to do the same and now I want to set the record straight. I didn't talk to people from high school for over ten years. It seems so silly now. I found out recently that I'm not the only one who grew up in college and beyond. We aren't kids anymore so the past is just that the past. I'll admit some of it I don't want to remember, but we did have some fun times in high school. The truth is something happened to me that I was not at all ready to talk about so I just avoided people. I got married in 1998 to a really great guy I met in college. We were giddy and in love. We decided after nine months of bliss to have a baby. Why not? I was bored and we wanted one. That sounds terrible to say that, but it is true. Boom one month later I was expecting. Three months later Jo
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