I am having a bad day. The last few days I have been off. This is bipolar. I was up, up, up excited and forgot to take my pills for three days. By Saturday, I was weepy and axious. There isn't a something. I just feel bad. Tears are at the edge of my eyelids. I am stressed about the house, bills, and our non exsistant parent strategies. The old insecurities started piling in and I just can't. To want to diapear and appear at the same time is quite a conundrum. I think my hormones are going nutty too which may be a huge part if it. I prayed for a little hope and a song came on the radio about hope. I asked God to help me believe. He answered me very specifically, but I don't FEEL better. I just know I will.
Up in the wee hours of the morning, is yet another perk of being bipolar. Yes, that's sarcasm because unlike some, I don't like being like this. I started getting a little more hyper than usual and now I can't sleep. I slept for an hour or two when hubby woke me up and I couldn't get back to sleep after. So I wasn't worried about anything, but I was wide awake. Even though I now feel tired, I still don't feel sleepy. It is hard to explain. Well I already took some calm down medicine and that didn't work so I am getting ready to take more. I use it only when I have to, but considering I need to function in a few hours I WILL consider this one of those times. I was excited about started school and I guess maybe I am going through an up cycle. That sort of makes sense since I had a down cycle in the beginning of the summer. I am glad that the cycles are much shorter than they used to be. I remember being tired and having little energy or ambition to do anyt...
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