True we are from dust and to dust we will return. I am just reflecting on our messed up life. That we keep people at arms length or more accurately they keep us. I have excepted my bipolar has that effect on people. If I am capable of saying things I wouldn’t normally say then I become this unsafe person. I still don’t understand the allusion of protecting my feelings. Maybe people still think mental illness makes you dumb. We are just lying here, hubby is joking about death because he’s sick, and I’m like… wait, if we did die who would notice. How many days would we just lie there? Haven’t slept well in three days so absolutely not coming from healthy place. Just saying. We might need to reconsider moving. Cause family might not LIKE the things we say and do that we shouldn’t, but they still love us. And that’s saying something.
Up in the wee hours of the morning, is yet another perk of being bipolar. Yes, that's sarcasm because unlike some, I don't like being like this. I started getting a little more hyper than usual and now I can't sleep. I slept for an hour or two when hubby woke me up and I couldn't get back to sleep after. So I wasn't worried about anything, but I was wide awake. Even though I now feel tired, I still don't feel sleepy. It is hard to explain. Well I already took some calm down medicine and that didn't work so I am getting ready to take more. I use it only when I have to, but considering I need to function in a few hours I WILL consider this one of those times. I was excited about started school and I guess maybe I am going through an up cycle. That sort of makes sense since I had a down cycle in the beginning of the summer. I am glad that the cycles are much shorter than they used to be. I remember being tired and having little energy or ambition to do anyt...
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