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The Road Ahead is Foggy

 I have been overwhelmed for a while now. I try not to be swept up into anxiety, but it creeps up on me. That leads to mania in my quest to avoid the anxiety which makes everything worse. I stay up too late and find myself staring into space fighting sleep. Eventually I start getting confused in the daytime. This has happened to me over and over so it’s nothing new. This time I truly had trouble seeing the sign in the dark and drove the wrong direction, but didn’t recognize it was wrong until I drove a couple exits. Sometimes I will be driving along and forget where I am going. It’s like my mind is tired of working. I do believe this has helped me understand dementia not just have compassion for it. When your mind just goes blank , and there’s nothing there. Yes, I know what that feels like. I know I talk to much when I am manic. It’s like being outside your own body and watching the car crash, but not being able to stop it. I am okay. Just tired and stressed. Too much , too much, huge stuff all at once. My brain has decided to protest. I still believe God made me this way on purpose! I have greater compassion, and creativity because of it. I just wish I could trust people would try a little harder to understand. Hebrews 4. Got to remember Jesus does.

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