It can be extremely frustrating to have legitimate challenges of mental health that “regular “ people either don’t understand or refuse to acknowledge. If I know you have diabetes, I am not going to give you a pound of sugar for Christmas. I know I can’t function well without sleep. It can cause a whole list of out of character things for me as well as put me at risk for mania. I am now seeing this may also mean taking my tiny list of friends and making it even smaller. I want to be healthy so I have to surround myself with people who support that. I can’t waist anymore time trying to prove it’s really a thing. It’s sad and I wish it wasn’t so hard. From a spiritual aspect, if there’s any little trace of unforgiveness in my heart towards someone, it will come bouncing out the minute I am overtired. The truth is that we are all works in progress, but maybe we all need to give each other more grace. I haven’t found my people yet. I still trust God has a purpose.
Up in the wee hours of the morning, is yet another perk of being bipolar. Yes, that's sarcasm because unlike some, I don't like being like this. I started getting a little more hyper than usual and now I can't sleep. I slept for an hour or two when hubby woke me up and I couldn't get back to sleep after. So I wasn't worried about anything, but I was wide awake. Even though I now feel tired, I still don't feel sleepy. It is hard to explain. Well I already took some calm down medicine and that didn't work so I am getting ready to take more. I use it only when I have to, but considering I need to function in a few hours I WILL consider this one of those times. I was excited about started school and I guess maybe I am going through an up cycle. That sort of makes sense since I had a down cycle in the beginning of the summer. I am glad that the cycles are much shorter than they used to be. I remember being tired and having little energy or ambition to do anyt...
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