It can be extremely frustrating to have legitimate challenges of mental health that “regular “ people either don’t understand or refuse to acknowledge. If I know you have diabetes, I am not going to give you a pound of sugar for Christmas. I know I can’t function well without sleep. It can cause a whole list of out of character things for me as well as put me at risk for mania. I am now seeing this may also mean taking my tiny list of friends and making it even smaller. I want to be healthy so I have to surround myself with people who support that. I can’t waist anymore time trying to prove it’s really a thing. It’s sad and I wish it wasn’t so hard. From a spiritual aspect, if there’s any little trace of unforgiveness in my heart towards someone, it will come bouncing out the minute I am overtired. The truth is that we are all works in progress, but maybe we all need to give each other more grace. I haven’t found my people yet. I still trust God has a purpose.
As a kid I watched my parents fight about different things. I don't really have any other parents to compare them to so I can't really say whether they were normal fights couples have or not. I couldn't even say what most of them were about except the ones that were about me. We only ate as a family on holidays. My father came home late so we kids ate without him. I do remember spending time with him in the evening before I went to bed so it couldn't have been that late. My own husband gets home a little later because of his job commute so we eat late every night. But home schooling has given us the ability to be more flexible than my Mom was able to be. We had school early the next day. As I got older, I remember my Father being home less and less and the fights seemed to intensify. I remember one night when I was thirteen. I could hear them yelling through the wall. My mom found me crying and I told her I didn't want them to get a divorce. She told me...
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