I have been in a loop of almost enough sleep for a couple of weeks now. I had already started to get a little fuzzy and confused. I finally had time off to sleep in and still woke up too early. This time I went back to sleep the times determined to get enough sleep to restore my brain. I got it. I guess my breathing wasn’t great during the night probably why I woke up so much. Anyway, hopefully now I can think straight to do what I need to do. Sometimes, I got to turn off everything and just rest. That isn’t laziness. It’s necessary. I have been teaching on Elijah this last month. The last lesson was on I Kings 19. Elijah is told by the angel of the Lord to ‘rest for the journey is too great for you.’ It is one of my favorite passages because it shows God’s tender loving care for his servant in weakness. Humans all have weaknesses and limitations, but God has no limits. When we cannot take another step, He takes care of us. Whether it means us needing to sleep or us needing strength to face something difficult, God is there.
I feel not so much a storm as a little shower of emotional rain. My mind is filled to the brim with thoughts and trying not to go batty trying to sort them through on my own. Then I start feeling isolated as I have no one to talk to. I have therapy next week so I will talk then for sure. It’s not even anything bad; it’s just so full I am thinking out loud. That never bothered me before, but now I am feeling unsteady. I have talked to myself my whole life. I am certainly not going to stop now, but it feels like a gateway to the enemy deceiving me all over again. He can disguise his voice to sound like anyone else. So if my thoughts are out loud, I’m Vulnerable. I miss my friends. I have a few here and there . I miss lighthearted fun. I am just waiting for God to pull the curtain on this season and to start to feel more like myself again. I’m not asking God for anything He doesn’t want me to have, I just need to get through this little shower. I know God still has things for me to d...
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