I had multiple people think I was depressed. I wasn’t. Mania is the opposite. Unfortunately, Newton’s law still applies. “What goes up must come down.” I definitely am feeling melancholy as my Pastor would say. Being still too tired to function normally, I am feeling down. Let’s face it; this is the hardest part after a mania. You can see the fear in people’s faces. They are concerned you’ll break. I am not going to break. I am weak though. I might need to cry. I might need to be reminded to look up. Now that reality has set in, my confidence is shaky. This isn’t my first time fighting this. I want to glorify God in the storm. Unfortunately, I am feeling like I need help. I need to be encouraged. I don’t need a pep talk to tell me to just stop it. I read that verse the other day, “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver.” Proverbs 25:11. I am not giving up. God will find a way to lift me back up again.
I am starting my own blog to reduce my boredom and give me a place to put my thoughts. Recently some people I know put some very difficult words out for all the world to see. I have been chicken to do the same and now I want to set the record straight. I didn't talk to people from high school for over ten years. It seems so silly now. I found out recently that I'm not the only one who grew up in college and beyond. We aren't kids anymore so the past is just that the past. I'll admit some of it I don't want to remember, but we did have some fun times in high school. The truth is something happened to me that I was not at all ready to talk about so I just avoided people. I got married in 1998 to a really great guy I met in college. We were giddy and in love. We decided after nine months of bliss to have a baby. Why not? I was bored and we wanted one. That sounds terrible to say that, but it is true. Boom one month later I was expecting. Three months later Jo...
Comments
Post a Comment