I had multiple people think I was depressed. I wasn’t. Mania is the opposite. Unfortunately, Newton’s law still applies. “What goes up must come down.” I definitely am feeling melancholy as my Pastor would say. Being still too tired to function normally, I am feeling down. Let’s face it; this is the hardest part after a mania. You can see the fear in people’s faces. They are concerned you’ll break. I am not going to break. I am weak though. I might need to cry. I might need to be reminded to look up. Now that reality has set in, my confidence is shaky. This isn’t my first time fighting this. I want to glorify God in the storm. Unfortunately, I am feeling like I need help. I need to be encouraged. I don’t need a pep talk to tell me to just stop it. I read that verse the other day, “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver.” Proverbs 25:11. I am not giving up. God will find a way to lift me back up again.
Up in the wee hours of the morning, is yet another perk of being bipolar. Yes, that's sarcasm because unlike some, I don't like being like this. I started getting a little more hyper than usual and now I can't sleep. I slept for an hour or two when hubby woke me up and I couldn't get back to sleep after. So I wasn't worried about anything, but I was wide awake. Even though I now feel tired, I still don't feel sleepy. It is hard to explain. Well I already took some calm down medicine and that didn't work so I am getting ready to take more. I use it only when I have to, but considering I need to function in a few hours I WILL consider this one of those times. I was excited about started school and I guess maybe I am going through an up cycle. That sort of makes sense since I had a down cycle in the beginning of the summer. I am glad that the cycles are much shorter than they used to be. I remember being tired and having little energy or ambition to do anyt...
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